


Let The Music Take Over

by Demonqueen21



Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Angst, Character's Name Spelled as Viktor, F/M, Fem!Yuuri, Genderbend, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-05-06
Updated: 2017-05-06
Packaged: 2018-10-28 16:18:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,126
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10834842
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Demonqueen21/pseuds/Demonqueen21
Summary: Genderbend Fem!Yuuri. Yuuri Katsuki makes a phenomenal comeback being the first woman to land a quad in figure skating history with Viktor Nikiforov as her coach. When one of the other skaters assaults her after a drunken celebration, her relationship with Viktor becomes strained as they work through their issues together.





	Let The Music Take Over

**Author's Note:**

> This was a request from Shiranai Atsune on my ffn account. Yuuri's free costume was based on one of Yuna Kim's costumes. I will always do requests for free, but feel free to buy me a coffee if you enjoy my work! https://ko-fi.com/A004J3V

Fandom: Yuri!!! On Ice 

Pairing: Viktor x Fem!Yuuri

Rating: T for language. Will eventually be explicit. 

Disclaimer: I don't own anything  

Warnings: Fem!Yuuri, angst, slow burn

Let The Music Take Over

Chapter 1: 

Come Back Into The Good Life,

Lose Those Hazy Love Lies

    “Wh-What? You mean...you were all watching?” A shaky voice cracked as it echoed within the empty bathroom walls. 

    “Of course, Yuuri! We all wanted to support you, and you were amazing! I still love the costume design for this season,” her mother’s voice was slightly muffled by static. Their long distance phone calls were always sketchy at best, but her mother had wanted to reassure her after the epic failure which was Yuuri’s Grand Prix Final. 

    She had fallen with every jump, and even though she immediately got up afterwards, the scores reflected how horrendous of a performance it was. Last place at the Grand Prix Final. Her country’s pride riding on her shoulders should have given her enough determination to bring them back a medal, but instead, the pressure got to her and her anxiety made her self-destruct. With every consistent jump’s failure, she fell more and more into the darkness of her own self-doubt until there was no hope of her calming down or bringing her score up. It was a failure from the start. Everything was stacked against her starting with Vicchan and her anxiety all the way to how the ice felt beneath her feet. She couldn’t help herself. After she got off the phone with a happy voice and a thank you, she let the tears fall. 

    They just wouldn’t stop falling. 

    It wasn’t until an hour or so later that she emerged from the restroom after splashing her face in an attempt to hide the redness behind her glasses. One of the Japanese reporters she was familiar with stopped her for a private word of encouragement and a plea to continue skating. Yuuri just smiled and said she hasn’t even decided anything yet. Yet. That was what was hanging on her mind. What was she going to do now?

    She continued down the hallway following Celestino before stopping with the sound of her name being called. She turned to see a flash of red and silver passing by her eyes as she realized it was the Russian Yuri he was talking to. Of course it was. She knew she should turn away, she wanted to, she really did. But he was just so beautiful. Viktor Nikiforov, the embodiment of perfection on ice and the current five-time champion. Not to mention drop dead gorgeous and Yuuri’s, along with thousands of other girl’s, celebrity crush. How could he not be? Nikiforov could turn a straight man flamboyantly gay. 

    “Oh? Do you want a picture?” His thick accent only emphasized just how sultry his voice was. Yuuri quickly turned her head. He caught her staring. Why was she staring? Because he was gorgeous, that’s why. Still, that’s no excuse. He’s bombarded with fans enough. Having another girl just stare at him is creepy. Besides, he’s a living legend. Why would he have any time for her to begin with? She’s just another figure skater, and not even a good one at that. She bit her bottom lip as she walked away, willing the tears to stay in her eyes where they belonged. She was a fool. 

    The next day was the Gala. She didn’t want to go. She completely disgraced herself the day before, so it wasn’t like any sponsors would approach Celestino wanting her. If she had looks like Nikiforov, then maybe. But she didn’t. It’s okay though. It’s just a Gala. Just a few, long, boring hours of manners and smiles. It’s okay. It’s fine. She could do this. A glass of champagne would help ease her nerves. It’s just a few more hours, and then she can go back to her soft hotel bed and sleep. She can do this. 

    The exhibition was another mandatory event for her. For all skaters for that matter, no matter how terrible their skating or hangover were. But it’s fine. Just line up and bow with all the other skaters, girls and boys, with a smile. Just smile and skate and then fly home. The pounding in her head was just a reminder how terrible her skating was to the point where she had to drink until a blackout. But since no one mentioned anything to her, she most likely just passed out then. It’s okay. Just smile and skate and bow. Pretend everything is fine. She’s good at that. She’s used to that. She’s fine.

 

    Parting the next day with Celestino has never made her so happy before. He’s been keeping her within arm's reach since her failure, and it’s borderline suffocating. He hugged her tightly.

    “You have the talent to go far, Yuuri. Everyone falls. It’s whether you get back up or not that determines your career,” he whispered so only she could hear. He meant well. She knew he only wanted the best for her, but...sometimes, words just weren’t enough. She hugged him back thinking that was the best option.

    “Thank you for everything.”

    “Take some time back home to clear your head. Keep in touch with me.”

    “I will.” 

    He looked like he wanted to say something else to her, but ended up just smiling as he waved her off. It’s been five years since she’s been home, and she was excited to see her family again after so long. But at the same time, she was scared. How could she hope to show her face there after the pitiful performance she displayed? After all the time and money her family has spent on her ballet and skating lessons? How could she have let them all down like this? What kind of a daughter was she?

    The seatbelt light flashed on, and the plane started its descent. Yuuri’s hope and relief quickly turned into a nervous panic as she realized she’s home again. She has to face her family whom she disappointed. She has to face her country whom she failed. She could have medaled, but she didn’t. She screwed up. She panicked just like she’s panicking now and ruined everything and she can’t breathe and and-

    “Excuse me, Miss?” A soft voice with a thick accent pulled her out of her spiraling thoughts. One of the flight attendants was holding a bottle of water out to her. Yuuri reached out with a small thank you. The attendant smiled and gave her a little wink before walking down the aisle. She took a sip of water and breathed. Her anxiety was getting worse to no surprise, but it was still manageable at this point. She didn’t need to get help for it yet. No reason to bring more shame on her family, she’s enough of a failure without a panic disorder diagnosis on top of it. 

    The plane landing and disembarkation was faster than Yuuri was expecting, so she was able to wheel her luggage past checkings within the hour only to come face to face with a wall. Not just any wall, but a wall covered floor to ceiling in posters. Specifically, posters of her. It was like she was staring at dozens of embarrassing mirrors of her plastered in public. A groan escaped her lips as she pulled her face mask up as far as it would go. Just let her die in peace. 

    “Yuuuuuuuuri~!” a familiar voice rang out over the linoleum floors. She turned to see long, brown hair flowing as her longtime ballet teacher kicked a leg up while holding a poster with her name proudly plastered on it. 

    “Mikano-sensei!” Yuuri couldn’t help but smile behind her mask. She ran over and hugged her teacher who spun her around like she was still just a child. 

    “It’s been so long since I last saw you in person! Five years is too damn long, young lady! Not even a visit for the holidays!” Minako scolded as Yuuri collected her luggage and started walking.  

    “I know. I’ve missed everyone.” And she did. She really, really did. But between skating and college, her free time was far and few inbetween. She would have loved to visit home before now, but she also wanted to bring them home a medal to show them everything she’s done. She wanted to give them a reason to be proud of her. She wanted to succeed… 

    “-ri? Yuuri?” Minako’s voice pulled her out of her thoughts.

    “Huh?”

    “Come on, don’t just stand in the middle of the airport. You’re in people’s way,” she said gently pulling her hand. 

    “Right.”

    It was a short train trip from the airport to the onsen where her family lived and worked. In five years, the place hasn’t changed all that much, and for that, she was glad. The familiar screen doors and living arrangements was oddly comforting to her. She smiled as she walked in, and smiled even wider when her mom rushed over to hug her. Of course, their happy reunion quickly turned into the mundane chores to help around the onsen that Yuuri so fondly remembers. She didn’t mind though. She liked being helpful. It was honestly the very least she could possibly due after her utter failure. And with the way her weight shot up after binge eating, she wasn’t stepping out on the ice anytime soon. 

    But that thought lasted all of a week before she found herself idly wandering around Hasetsu only to end up at the door of Ice Castle. She sighed as she opened the door to the familiar rink and heard a call. 

    “I’m sorry! We’re closed today!”

    “Even for your childhood friend?” She smiled as Yuuko’s head shot up from behind the counter. 

    “Yuuri!” And like a flash, Yuuko was in her arms hugging her. They laughed and talked and reminisced. After all, it had been five years since they last saw each other. Her triplets showed themselves, and Yuuri marveled at how big they’d gotten. They were barely one when she had left for Detroit and Takashi came out hugging her and teasing her for her weight like he used to when they were kids. It was warm and nice and God, Yuuri had missed it. Eventually, Takashi took the girls to help clean up the back while Yuuri and Yuuko sat on the bleachers talking. It got quiet while Yuuko debated saying something, and Yuuri knew all too well what words were going to come next. 

    “So...Yuuri. What are you going to do now?”

    “That’s a good question,” she laughed. She laughed despite all the guilt and anguish inside her. She laughed despite her shortcomings and failures. She laughed a short, bitter laugh because that was a good question. It was the best damn question of the year. What was she going to do now? It’s not like she can just go back to skating like nothing happened.

    “Are you going to keep skating?”

    “I don’t know if I can. After that complete failure of mine, I don’t think I’m cut out for the ice anymore.”

    “Oh Yuuri, you and I both know that you’re cut straight from the ice. Skating is in your blood, and one failure doesn’t mean anything.”

    “It does when that failure decides my career.” She sighed as she rested her head on the bleachers behind her. The lights overhead were half on half off since the rink was technically closed. 

    “Yuuri. I can’t make you do anything. You’re too stubborn for that.” Yuuri laughed at that and Yuuko smiled. “But I guarantee you this, you love skating and nothing can change that.” Yuuri just kept staring at the lights hanging overhead. She knew Yuuko was right. She did love skating, and she didn’t want to quit...but how could she continue? “Do you remember how when we were kids, whenever you got bullied, we would sneak over here after school to skate? To just let loose and relax?”

    “Un, I remember.”

    “You’ve always found your answers and your solace on the ice. What makes this time any different?” She was smiling then, and Yuuri smiled back.

    “It’s not,” was her only reply before following Yuuko to the counter for a pair of skates. She laced them up and handed Yuuko her phone for music. The idle classical music she had was good for her warmup figures, and Yuuko never looked away. She slid to the center of the rink and held a short pose before the next [[song]](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qqPa_QAFQT0) started to play. 

    The soft piano notes flew by effortlessly as she began to skate. Her arms were reaching for Yuuko and the skies above as the lyrics lined up with her movements. Her steps were mesmerizing and emotional and Yuuko smiled because Yuuri was smiling, not a forced smile, but a truly happy one. How could she ever think of giving up the ice after all these years? 

    Yuuri glides backwards into a camel spin before jumping. Yuuko’s eyes go wide because she made it seem so effortless, so flawless that she could have gotten a clean silver just for that one jump. Not to mention her steps were gorgeous and emotive. This was everything a judge would be looking for and it pained Yuuko’s heart knowing that her anxiety was what was holding her back from the glory she so well deserves. The music crescendoed and her eyes went wide as she watched her childhood friend leap in the air rotating once, twice, thrice, and a fourth time before landing and speeding up into her flawless finishing spin. That was four rotations. Yuuri did a quad. 

    Yuuri landed a beautiful quad. 

    “Oh my God! Yuuri! YUURI!” Yuuko was screaming, waving her arms. “You just landed a quad! That’s amazing! You’re amazing! Yuuri!”

    “Don’t get so excited, it’s only a toe-loop,” she said as she skated to the wall to meet her friend. 

    “What do you mean ‘only’? If you landed a quad in competition, you’d be the new game changer of the sport! You’d be the first woman to land a quad in competition! You’d make history!” Yuuri just laughed at that.

    “Just because I can do it in practice doesn’t mean I can do it during competition. I can barely skate during competitions,” her tone was sharper than she was expecting, which made Yuuko calm down a bit. She smiled and hugged Yuuri regardless, which she appreciated. 

    “I think it’s a waste for you to quit, but know I’m always on your side. You can come here as often as you’d like,” Yuuko whispered in her ear still holding her over the wall. Yuuri sighed as she hugged her back. 

    “I still don’t know if I’m going to quit, yet. And thank you, I’ll be coming here quite a bit,” she nervously laughed as she skated to the gate and started unlacing her skates. 

    The walk home was peaceful and quiet, the snow had started to fall that morning to everyone’s surprise. It was supposed to be perfect weather for flower viewing, but the cold front came blowing in without notice. She only sighed knowing full well that she would be the one shovelling all the snow off the entranceway. It didn’t matter though, she was glad to be home and glad to be useful for once. 

 

    That night, Yuuri got a phonecall. 

    And some very, very bad news.

    “I’m so sorry, Yuuri! The triplets must have been recording while we were in the rink today!” She heard Yuuko apologetically panicking through the receiver. Yuuko then yelled in the background at what sounded like three crying children, something Yuuri would be sounding like very soon, too. 

    She knew she shouldn’t have watched the video. She knew it would only make things worse, but what does she do? She watches the video. All two minutes and fifty-five seconds of it before the sweat started cascading down her neck. She was screwed. Absolutely screwed. It was barely posted but it was quickly going viral and the comments were already pouring in. 

 

[sk8rkid_88] Whoa! Man those graphics look real! Who edited this?

[aurorarara] YUURI KATSUKI JUST LANDED A REAL QUAD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[kat-sukidesu] OH MY GOSH KATSUKI JUST CHANGED THE GAME!!!!!! NeXt SeAsOn Is GoNnA bE LIT :DDDDD

[PhePhiPhoPhum] lolololol y’all are idiots! no way a dime-a-dozen skater like her could have done a quad. its bad video editing anyway lololol losers

[aurorarara] @PhePhiPhoPhum No way! She’s got the drive and talent to do it! There’s no editing here, just a pure, beautiful QUAD!!!!!!

[baneman] man that chick’s thighs are thicker than a snicker, yum

[rolypoly32] ***THIS COMMENT HAS BEEN REMOVED DUE TO INAPPROPRIATE CONTENT***

[kat-sukidesu] @rolypoly32 THAT IS DISGUSTING!!! DON’T TALK ABOUT HER LIKE THAT EWW SHE’S A REAL PERSON! RESPECT HER JFC #ProtectKatsuki2k17

[Niki-nofo] @aurorarara Please, if she could do that in practice, why not competition? Of course it’s faked. Plenty of skaters have faked jumps for PR before, shes nothing special

[Korela228] lol she’s too fat to pull a quad off #FAKE

[Danimani069] @Korela228 the only quad coming out of her is a quad XL sized pants for those thighs lol

 

    Oh God, why is she even a skater? She turned her phone off and threw it on a desk or a chair or something. She didn’t care; she just buried her head in the pillow and bit back the burn in her eyes. She tried so hard, yet the hot tears pooled before being absorbed by the thin fabric of her pillow. 

    She knew she was gaining a few pounds on her off season, most skaters did. And sure, maybe she gained weight more easily than others, but still… She didn’t think it was enough for a phone video to pick up. The tears burned hotter and she felt her heart picking up pace. Her palms were starting to sweat and she sat up, wiping her tears away. No! She wasn’t going to panic. Not over some stupid, mean comments. Not because of some anonymous assholes. Not because she’s a complete failure in her career…

    She jumps up and smacks her cheeks, determination burning within her. She wasn’t going to have a panic attack, not now. Before she could change her mind, she slid on her sneakers and sweats and ran. She just needed to move, to distract herself, to run away from her problems. She hated this side of herself. She hated herself. 

    The cold, night air nipped at her face, but she kept going. The second she stopped running, she knew she wouldn’t be able to hold back the tears, so she kept going. It didn’t matter where her feet took her; she just had to keep running. It was pathetic, she knew that more than anyone, but she couldn’t help herself. She was going to panic and cry and her lungs were already burning from the cold air. She didn’t stop running. Even when the first burning tear dripped down her cheek, she kept running. Even when she was gasping for each breath between sobs, she kept running. Even when her head spun from a lack of air, she kept running. 

    She kept running until she collapsed into a wall, shaking and crying, lungs begging for air as her legs burned and her feet ached. Her head was spinning and the tears freely cascaded down her cheeks and neck before being soaked into the neckline of the t-shirt she sleeps in. She stayed there until her fingers went numb and her breathing evened out. It was probably two hours before she had enough control over herself to even stand. How pathetic was she, really?

    The only good thing about this little escapade was she somehow ended up at the doors of the skating rink. Even in her panic over her skating, her body just instinctively brought her to the only place where she can truly be calm. Sighing, she pulls out the key from her pocket that Yuuko gave her and entered the empty building. 

    Skating has always been her solace, and even now, it’s no different. With her phone plugged in and the moonlight shining through, she takes to the ice skating for just herself and no one else for once. The [[music]](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NukB4nck5sQ) plays with a soft vibrating beat and she relaxes into the movements that come so naturally to her.  Soft, wide movements before switching to a spin as the music speeds up. She feels the crescendo in her bones before her ears even register the music, and she couldn’t help herself, she smiled as she jumped a triple lutz before landing and moving into a spread eagle. Her arms were moving to the music and her head spun as she slid across the crisp ice. 

    This was perfect. This felt right. She may not be cut out for competing, but this right here, alone on the moonlit ice, skating for herself and no one else. This was what she was made for. This was where she could make magic. She couldn’t help herself. Even with all the failures tagged to her name, when she was skating like this, she could only smile as she let the music take over. 

  
  


    Going to Ice Castle in the middle of the night after crying and having a panic attack was probably a bad idea. Staying in Ice Castle skating all night long was probably an even worse idea. She was exhausted and exhilarated all at the same time. She stayed skating until Yuuko came in the morning to get ready to open and kicked her out, chastising her for her idiocy. She couldn’t really blame her though, skating all night was pretty stupid. The snowy sidewalks made her walk home slower than usual, so everyone was already up and working by the time she made it through the gates of Yu-topia. To her surprise, however, she’s greeted by a ghost. 

    A much bigger ghost. 

    “V-Vicchan!?” she cried out as a much larger version of her miniature poodle jumped onto her, toppling them both into the snowy grass. She heard her father laugh. 

    “He does look identical to Vicchan doesn’t he? He belongs to a handsome foreigner who came by late last night,” her dad idly said as he walked by carrying sheets. 

    Yuuri and the dog took instantly. He would follow her around as she helped her father do the laundry and snuggled in her lap when she sat down to take a break. She was petting his head when she heard a thickly accented voice behind her. 

    “Makkachin? Where’d you run off to?”

    She froze. She recognized that voice. Any skater in their right mind would recognized that Russian accent. Slowly turning, she came face-to-face with  _ the _ Viktor Nikiforov. Which means the poodle that was still lovingly draped across her lap was his poodle. She was petting his dog. If she wasn’t about to panic, she would probably be the happiest person in the world right about now, but she wasn’t. She had already embarrassed herself in front of him at the skating rink before. She just...had to not do that again. She quickly turned her head to stare straight down at the dog in her lap. He probably didn’t even remember her. He meets thousands of fans every single day, what makes her special enough for a memory?

    “Ah, there you are boy. Are you enjoying the nice company?” He sat down next to Yuuri with a smile as Makkachin barked and wagged his tail. His green robe was loosely tied around his waist, so Yuuri could clearly see his smooth, toned chest peeking out from behind the fabric. The flowery scent of his shampoo wafted over to her. She swallowed.  

    “I hope he hasn’t been giving you too much trouble. He seems to have taken a liking to you,” he gave out a short laugh and Yuuri could feel herself melting right then and there.

    “No! Not at all! He’s a wonderful dog,” she smiled as she pet Makkachin again. She could have been imagining it, but she thought she saw Viktor’s face brighten. 

    “Ah, do you like dogs?”

    “Yes, we used to have a miniature poodle. He looked just like Makkachin here. I thought I was seeing a ghost at first,” she laughed. Talking to Viktor was a lot easier than she was expecting. Maybe it was just because they were chatting about dogs, but she was oddly comfortable. They talked more about Makkachin before she had to go help her mother in the kitchen. 

    Lunch was served and cleaned up before Yuuri took off for Ice Castle. She loved being back and being useful, but serving and interacting with all the patrons still put her on edge. A little stress skating always helped her before. 

    Yuuko gave a nod to her as she walked inside. There was a private lesson just now ending, so the rink was still empty. Yuuri smiled as she took to the ice doing wide loops and figures for warm up. 

    “Any specific song you want?” Yuuko called out over the loudspeaker. 

    “Cold Skin by Seven Lions. It should be in my recently played,” she called back. 

    The music started up and Yuuri relaxed into the beat. She was retracing her steps that she had been performing the night before into a crisper version of the choreography. It was still elementary in its design, but it felt good. It felt right and she could feel the stress being left behind with every jump and every spin before landing a triple loop and abruptly stopping in a dramatic pose. She had done a fast spin as the finale last night, but she wanted to play around with some elements with it. After all, it’s not like she’s performing this. She may as well have fun with it. 

    Until she looked over towards the bleachers, finally realizing she wasn’t as alone as she thought. Viktor Nikiforov was standing behind the plexiglass watching her with a critical eye and a finger placed across his lips. She swallowed and sheepishly skated over to the gate, wanting to go home and cry. She couldn’t believe he was watching her. Of course he would visit the skating rink though, he was an international champion. She was an idiot for thinking she could skate in peace while he’s in town. 

    “Starting today, I’m your new coach, Yuuri~” he said with a wide smile. 

    She misheard that, right?

    “What?”

    “I’m going to be your new coach!”

    “No! No way! I’m not good enough! Beside, you can’t compete and coach at the same time!” she had barely placed on her skate guards due to her shaking hands. 

    “I was going to take a break this season anyway for inspiration, and you seems like the perfect student to take on! Besides, you’ve already made it to the Grand Prix once, so that makes things even easier!” he smiled his heart shaped smile as Yuuri sat down to unlace her skates. She wanted to get out of here as fast as she could. 

    “Y-You knew about that?!” Oh God, she wanted to crawl under a rock and die.

    “Of course! I went to cheer on Mila and saw you there. But if you have a quad in your repertoire, then you’ll have no problem winning against her.”

    “Well, I don’t know if I’m even going to continue skating after this last season.”

    “Well, that’s stupid. You’re continuing,” he smiled as he clapped his hands together. 

    “Well, you can’t just make decisions for me, you know.”

    “Well, I’m making this one for you!”

    “That’s not how this works!”

    “As your new coach, I say it is!”

    Yuuri just stares at him. She’s completely flabbergasted. Not only is her celebrity crush and idol in front of her, but he’s saying he wants to coach her? What kind of sick prank is this? She doesn’t even know how to respond to this ridiculous conversation. What do you even say in this situation? Finally getting her skates off, she walks up to the box where Yuuko is waiting with her phone and an excited expression. 

    “YUURI IS THAT  _ THE _ VIKTOR NIKIFOROV, FIVE TIME CHAMPION, THE LIVING LEGEND?!” she was basically screaming. Yuuri smiled. She couldn’t blame her, she feels the exact same way. 

    “Get this, he wants to coach me,” she says with a bitter laugh as she sits on the rolly computer chair. 

    Yuuri wishes she had her phone ready to take a picture of Yuuko’s face. 

    “Are you serious!? But he’s a competitor?!” 

    “He says he’s taking a season off.”

    “You have to say yes! This is a once in a lifetime chance!”

    “Yuuko, he saw me at the Grand Prix.” Yuuri laid her head down on the dash. 

    “So? He obviously sees some major talent in you if he’s wanting to coach you on his off season!” she was still ecstatic about this turn of events. 

    “He just sees me as some plaything to entertain him! He saw the stupid video and wants me to skate quads at the Grand Prix!” 

    “Well, what’s so wrong about that? You’re talented and you would make history doing that,” Yuuko smiled at her. 

    “You don’t get it, Yuuko!”

    “You’re right, Yuuri. I don’t get it. Why are you so against this?” Yuuko was a good friend, and she was an angel for letting Yuuri practice whenever she was anxious. But despite all that, she didn’t really get Yuuri’s anxiety. She didn’t understand that Yuuri couldn’t go out on the ice again after the pitiful performance, if she could even call it that, she gave at the last Grand Prix, and she definitely didn’t want to be some playtoy for anyone with her quads, not even her idol. It...It was just too much. She was already thinking of quitting competitive skating, and this huge ordeal kind of just made her want to quit even more. How could she explain this?

    “I...I just...can’t. I can’t do this.” Her voice came out weak and wispy. She looked away from her friend in favor of looking at Viktor, who was waving up towards the box at her. 

    “Yuuri, I love you, and no matter what, I will support you. But I want you to know this. You’re an idiot if you say no.” Yuuri looked up at her with those words. “This is  _ the _ Nikiforov we’re talking about. How many other people would die for this chance you’re so willing to throw away? I think it’s a huge mistake to say no.” 

    Yuuri turned those words over carefully in her head as Yuuko’s phone pinged. She had a point there, but Yuuri really didn’t think anything special about herself. Sure Viktor would have a better time coaching the Russian Yuri. He’s already got a fan following and has made a name for himself. Besides, he’s moving up to the senior division if Yuuri remembers correctly. Hell, he could even coach Mila. She’s already third in the world and his rinkmate. Why can’t he play coach with his own team?

    “Yuuri, I think you need to see this,” Yuuko’s voice was filled with worry as she handed the news article on her phone to her. 

 

「  V iktor Nikiforov, Five-Time World Champion, Has Left Russia To Coach Japan

Viktor Nikiforov has once again surprised the world with this shocking turn of events. He has announced a break for the next season in favor of coaching a Japanese athlete. 

“That man does nothing except think of himself,” Yakov Feltsman said, Nikiforov’s former coach.

High expectations come for Nikiforov’s new student…

[Click to Continue]   」

 

Yuuri could already feel the sweat pooling at her neck. It was all over the news now. She couldn’t say no. She couldn’t say no now. How would it look?

    “Yuuri…” 

    “I can’t say no now.”

    “You still could, if you really wanted to.”

    “It doesn’t matter,” Yuuri puts her head in her hands. “What’s one more year to skating?” 

    Viktor was ecstatic when they were walking back to Yu-topia and she told him yes. He immediately picked her up in a hug and twirled her. Yuuri froze. She could feel her heart pounding because Viktor fucking Nikiforov just hugged her. She could die happy now, oh jeez. She thought she was about to have a heart attack immediately and decided that next to the beach in Viktor’s arms would be a perfect place to die.

    “Now, you’ve gained some weight on the off season, Little Piggy. So you have to get back down to your competition weight before we let you on the ice!”

    It seems like everything Viktor says or does makes Yuuri freeze. 

    Except this time, she can feel the tears coming too. 

    “E-excuse me?”

    “You’ll never be able to do a quad in competition with all that extra weight,” he shot her a bright, heart-shaped smile as he tilted his head. Yuuri could feel the burning behind her eyes as she started to blink, begging the tears to just go away. But they never did. 

    “I can’t believe you would say something like th-that,” her voice cracks with the last word and the tears finally fall. She immediately rubs them away and runs off as more tears burn her cheeks. She doesn’t notice Viktor reaching out and missing her hand. She doesn’t hear Viktor cursing under his breath. All she does is run and cry, praying she won’t run into anyone. 

    Yuuri should be surprised that her legs ended up carrying her back to Ice Castle, but she really wasn’t. She was just so used to skating away her feelings by now that crying and ice skating were hand-in-hand to her. She wipes away the last of her tears as she laces up her skates for the second time that day. 

    She knew she had gained a few pounds, but not nearly enough for him to degrade her like that. She shakes her head as the [[music]](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MPQdQd7vY1g) starts playing. 

    The piano chords play behind the high pitched lyrics as Yuuri melts into a large backwards spin, hiding her face behind her hand. The figure eight makes it easy to spin around as her arms sweep behind her to align with the lyrics. She relaxes into the large spins and bends back into a layback Ina Bauer. She’s unsteady as she does it and tightens her stomach hoping she won’t fall, and she just barely is able to hold it before wobbling back straight. She plants her foot down hard as she jumps up for a salchow. She made the full three rotations she needed, but when she landed on her other foot, the edge slipped underneath her and she landed, hard, on her shoulder. 

    That was going to bruise. 

    “Yuuri! Are you okay? That looked like it hurt!” Yuuko called out as she came from around the back of the bleachers. She was holding a trash bag, so she was probably cleaning up trash from kids. 

    “Yeah, yeah. I’m fine.”

    “What are you doing here anyway? Didn’t you just leave with Viktor Nikiforov?”

    “Yeah,” Yuuri’s voice was wavering to the point where even she could hear it. Yuuko walked over to the wall so she could talk to Yuuri. 

    “Oh, sweetie. What happened?”

    Yuuri couldn’t stop herself. The tears started falling again. She hated how weak she was. 

    “He...He said I gained t-too much weight. And...And called me ‘Little Piggy’ and...like...he just...he just-” she was sniffling as the tears fell on the ice and Yuuko leaned over the wall to hug her, shushing her. 

    “Oh, sweetie. Shh, it’s okay. How dare he, just because he’s a famous figure skater doesn’t give him the right to be so rude to you. Hey, hey. Yuuri, it’s okay. Don’t cry, shh…” she cooed into her ear as she stroked her soft hair. It was just barely down to her shoulders, so she could only recently pull it into a tiny ponytail. She usually wore braids for her competitions, but she was trying to grow her hair longer. 

    “Now come on,” Yuuko wiped the tears off of her cheeks with a smile. “Why don’t you show me that routine you were just working on?” 

    “What?! N-No! It’s not...a routine. I’m just...skating,” she meekly says. 

    “Well, it looked really pretty from what I saw. Will you show me the full thing?”

    “I-I don’t really have a full routine…”

    “Will you show me what you have then? You know I love watching you skate,” Yuuko’s eyes were shining so brightly. Yuuri just couldn’t say no. 

    The same [[song]](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MPQdQd7vY1g) plays and Yuuri repeats the sorrowful movements, but more confident this time. She can see the emotions bubbling up out of her as she ducks down for a camel sit spin. She didn’t exactly know what to do after her spin, but she always enjoyed spread eagle jumps, so she spread her legs wide and arched her back for balance. Her face was an open book on the ice with every sorrowful emotion pouring onto the ice like a fog machine as she leaped into a triple salchow. The landing was beautiful and Yuuko was clapping at her. 

    Neither one of them noticed the flash of silver standing by the doors, silently watching. By the time Yuuko finally looked over, the doors were already shut and it was just the two of them. 

 

    Yuuri felt a lot better after the skate. She was even smiling when she walked into the living space of the onsen. Where Viktor was waiting with Makkachin. She took a deep breath. 

    “Vik-” she started.

    “I wante-” he stopped.

    They both stopped and awkwardly stared at each other. 

    “You g-” he started. 

    “You fir-” she stopped. 

    They stared awkwardly again at each other. This was getting ridiculous. 

    “I’m sorry!” They both blurted out at the same time. “What?” They were in sync. How cute. 

    “I didn’t mean to offend you,” Viktor went first. “I was just trying to motivate you to get ready for competition again. I didn’t mean to upset you.”

    “No, no! I was overreacting anyway. I gain weight easily, so I guess I’m just a little sensitive about it…” she trailed off a bit. 

    “I should have worded it better. It wasn’t supposed to be a jab at you. I’m still new at coaching, but I’m trying my best,” he gave a sheepish smile. 

    “Why are you even coaching me then?”

    “Your body makes music.” Viktor said that like it was obvious. 

    “Excuse me?”

    “The video of you. Everyone is obsessing over your quad, which is very impressive, but what caught my attention was the pure emotion in your movements like…” he waves his hands around a bit as he thinks of the words. “Like you have music from within overflowing out of you, and I wanted to see more.” He smiled that heart-shaped smile that made her swoon. This wasn’t good for her heart. 

    “So it’s purely selfish on your part then?” Yuuri smiled as Viktor froze, mouth agape as he tried to say something, but nothing came. Yuuri could broke out in a laugh at that sight. “Don’t worry, it’s a joke.”

    Viktor awkwardly laughs, too, before arranging her practice to start the next morning at Ice Castle. Yuuko assured them that they could have the rink all to themselves whenever they needed and they started to prepare for the Chugoku, Shikoku, and Kyushu Championship for Yuuri to qualify again for international events. 

    It was two weeks before Yuuri had gotten back down to her competitive weight, which means she could finally start working on her choreography with Viktor. To everybody’s surprise, the Russian Yuri met her at the door of Ice Castle screaming at Viktor. A lot of Russian was spoken, and the triplets barged in somewhere within the conversation, and Yuuri still doesn’t exactly know what happened, but her first competition is a lot sooner than the Chugoku, Shikoku, and Kyushu Championships. Hot Springs!!! On Ice was now a televised event, and Viktor stuck her with a sexual routine that there’s no way in hell she can pull off. 

    “Honestly, what is he thinking…” she mumbles to herself as Viktor poses in a ridiculous costume for the cameras to promote their onsen. She could feel the panic quickly rising, along with the lump in her throat. The teenaged ‘Yurio’ degrading her doesn’t really make her feel any better about herself either. 

    Yuri doing a perfect triple axel for his first jump only made her more nervous. She watched wide-eyed as everyone in the audience was drawn into his performance. It was beautiful. His quad salchow- triple toe loop combo only made her chest burn as the panic started to rise even more. He was going to win this and Viktor was going to leave to go back to Russia. She just got Viktor and he was already going to leave again. 

    Yuri nailed his final quad toe loop and Yuuri idly wondered why she ever agreed to this stupid event. Why was she even a skater? If a fifteen-year-old can land these quads so easily, why was she even trying? What was the point? 

    “Yurio! That was the best performance I’ve seen from you so far!” Viktor called out over the applause and Yuuri felt her heart drop. Yuri just gave an amazing performance. He’ll definitely rank among the top skaters in the senior division. 

    Which means Viktor will go back to Russia. She doesn’t want that. She wants to win. She has to win. She  _ has _ to win. She closed her eyes as her head started to spin. 

    “Yuuri? Yuuri,” Viktor’s voice was in front of her. “It’s your turn.” She gave out a gasp before quickly covering her mouth. She wasn’t ready. She would never be ready. There was no way she could compete with Yuri’s performance. There was no way. But...if she wanted to keep Viktor, she had to. She  _ must _ . 

    “Um...I-I’m…” she swallowed before forcing her nerves to settle as best as she could. “I’m going to become a super tasty pork cutlet bowl, so please watch me!” Oh God, what was she even saying?! He must think she’s an idiot! She wrapped her arms around his neck, hiding her face in his shoulder. “Promise,” she almost whispered, and to her surprise, Viktor’s reply was sincere. 

    “Of course. I love pork cutlet bowls.” 

    And with those words, she stepped onto the ice. 

    The soft guitar strums rang out as the [[music]](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AUDR2bflM1s) began and she ran her arms along her body before snapping her head towards Viktor when the music paused. Her smirk gave off no hint of her previous panic, and the whistle Viktor gave only inflated her icy self-confidence. She could do this. She could win. 

    The violins picked up and she was off, skating and dancing, seducing the audience. Seducing Viktor. Her steps were solid as she glided around the rink. Her spread eagle into a triple axel went without a hitch, but she was starting to feel the burn in her stomach. All her jumps were in the second half of the performance due to her stamina, but even so, she still flubbed the triple salchow. Damn it. 

    Don’t panic. A mistake like that isn’t enough to lose the eros. She still had her charms. It was only a touch down. She was still eros. She was better than any woman or man out there, and she showed everyone by landing her quad toe loop-triple toe loop combo perfectly. The audience roared with approval as she continued into her camel spin-sit spin combination. 

    Her routine came to a close, and she was exhausted, but the crowd cheered and Viktor called out to her with a smile. He wrapped his arms around her when she got to the gate and her heart was pounding even more after that. 

    “Yuuri~ That was the tastiest pork cutlet bowl I’ve ever seen! Wonderful,” he said still holding onto her. 

    “Th-Thank you,” she managed to squeak out. 

    “But can I say something?”

    “S-Sure.”

    “What was with your triple axel out of the spread eagle? That was the worst attempt so far. I know you had Yurio teach you the quad salchow in secret, but what was that? You messed up on just a triple?” Viktor was criticizing her a mile a minute and her head was spinning. “Huh? Yuuri? Are you listening?”

    No, not really. 

    But it’s okay, because in the end, she still somehow ended up winning. And with Viktor’s arm around her, she relaxed in front of the camera on the podium. She could feel his support through his hand. 

    “I’m going to try and win the next Grand Prix Final with Viktor! Thank you for your continued support!” 

 

    Finally the day of the Chugoku, Shikoku, and Kyushu Championship came. It was a struggle getting there, especially since Viktor insisted that Yuuri picked her own music for her free program. Which is a struggle in itself. But then Viktor says all these ridiculous things to the cameras and placing all these terrible expectations on her, making her panic rise up even more. She can feel the sweat pouring down her neck as her breathing started to quicken. 

    “Yuuri~ Makkachin is cheering for you too!” Viktor smiled as he held up a tissue box cover that looked just like the poodle. 

    “Oh, yeah. Real cute,” she idly said as she pulled a tissue out. She needed to calm down. 

    “Try to be happier,” Viktor was whining and Yuuri almost smiled at that sight. 

    Of course, Yuuri pulled the first number. She was already nervous enough, but having to go first? Why did God hate her? Warm-ups were just now ending, and she went over to Viktor to grab some water before her short program. Her hands were shaking a bit, but it wasn’t too bad. She would be okay. Probably. Hopefully. She had to be okay.

    “Yuuri, turn around,” Viktor said. 

    “Huh?”

    “Turn around, okay?” Viktor said more forcefully, which she obliged. What she wasn’t expecting was a hug. Or the encouraging words he said into her ear leaving her flustered and not at all paying attention to the crowd or the skate she was about to do. All she could focus on was the feeling of his breath on her skin and her own lacking sex appeal. 

    The [[music]](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AUDR2bflM1s) started again and she ran through the step sequence just like she did in practice. She was more confident and Viktor’s words of encouragement somehow worked. She was a pork cutlet bowl fantale that enthralls men. Her spread eagle into a triple axel landed so perfectly that even Viktor won’t be able to nag her about it afterwards. She’ll continue the momentum with a triple salchow! 

    She over-rotated it and had a touchdown. That was going to be a deduction, but it’s okay. Her last jump is a combination worth the most points. A quad toe loop into a….double toe loop. Crap, she messed up. Viktor would hang her head for that. At least the crowd was still clapping.

    As she skated off the ice, a teenaged boy came up gushing to her. She awkwardly laughs and signs the autographs that him and his friends begged for. The three of them were competing in the men’s competition and stayed to watch her skate. She didn’t really know how to take the compliments like this, but she smiled her best smile and signed all their stuff and even posed for pictures with them. 

    “You seemed comfortable with those boys at the rink. Are they your friends?” Viktor asked as they rode the train back to Hasetsu. 

    “Huh? Oh, no. I think they just are fans, I guess.” 

    “I see.” 

 

    The free program was the next day, and since Yuuri was in first place after the short program, she was the last to perform for the free. They have two quads planned, but Viktor wanted to tone down the difficulty to only one quad for this event. Yuuri wasn’t too sure about it. 

    It was finally time for her to perform, and she could hear the cheering from the boys from yesterday. She saw a flash of red and yellow waving at her, and she smiled back before waving at Minami. Him and his friends came to watch the women’s free after they finished their’s. 

    Viktor rubbed some chapstick on her lips as she unzipped her Japan representative jacket. Her free skate costume was something Viktor put together to be a representation of her short program and her skating theme combined. He wanted her to have a more sultry look for the free skate to match the lyrics of the song she picked. 

    The black mesh sleeve travels down her right arm while the left sleeve matches her skin tone. Both arms are speckled with white crystals and her skirt has the iconic bright red inside, both to match her short program outfit. Her chest and neck were streaked with a pattern of white, blue, red, and back to white curve down to the red slitted fabric at her hip. The dark blue fabric only accentuated the peeks of red that flashed with her movements. 

    Her theme was Sexual Love. 

    “That’s a perfect costume for you. You look beautiful in it,” Viktor spoke as he pushed a stray fray poking out of her braid back into place. He hugged her, gently patting her back, and she hugged him back. His arms around her made the anxiety melt away. Which she definitely needed, especially with what she was planning. 

    The [[music]](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5OhOfORdbao) begins with the thumping of drums along with the plucking of a guitar as Yuuri starts her steps with a quick spin to flash the red of her skirt. She hears the crowd cheer as she starts the movements before jumping into her quad toe-double toe combination when the lyrics start up. She was originally supposed to be a quad-triple, but if she’s planning on doing both quads, then she needs to change the elements up a bit. Hopefully Viktor won’t be too upset.

    She feels the emotions pouring out of the lyrics and tries to match the feelings before jumping into her three rotations for her salchow. Her hand touches the cold ice and she scolds herself before doing a spin and a perfect triple loop. She can feel the tension rising up as she leans back into her layback Ina Bauer and jumps as the bass drops in the music. Her triple axel was wobbly, but she hung in enough to continue on into an edge rotation and a triple flip, which she almost fell backwards on, but somehow managed to stay upright through sheer determination. 

    Her steps grew faster and the turns sharper as the beat picked up and the words grew needy. She over-rotated with her triple axel-single loop-triple salchow combination and had another touchdown. She wasn’t solid on most of her jumps, but the crowd was still mesmerized by her movements. The triple lutz-triple toe loop combo went along better which shot her into a sensual step sequence, her chest and arms glittering as her skirt fluttered around her thighs. 

    She feels the tension rising up as her legs start to hurt from the strain. She’s almost running on empty by now, but the music crescendos and she takes off into a quadruple toe-loop before wobbling on the landing and smashing face-first into the wall. The crowd gasps but she continues into her final spin before dramatically posing with her arms spread wide and her head towards the sky as the music cuts. There’s a thick silence, where Yuuri almost starts to panic, before the crowd cries out their applause. 

    She can feel the blood trickling down from her nose as she sheepishly looks over at Viktor, wondering just how pissed he’ll be that she reverted back to both quads. He hides his face in his hand before opening his arms for her. Her heart melts and she can feel the tears pooling in her eyes. She hurriedly skates over and jumps in his arms. 

    “Viktoooooor!” Or, she thought she was jumping in his arms. 

    “Oop, watch the nosebleed,” he smiled as he sidestepped her hug. 

    They sat at the kiss-and-cry as her scores are called out. 155.20 for her free skate bringing her total score to 229.73 breaking not only the current women’s free skate world record and combined score world record, but also making history as being the first woman to successfully land a quad in competition. She did it. She actually did it.

    She just made history. 

    The reporters flooded her. The cameras flashed. The boys from earlier were surrounding her and she smiled and laughed through all of it. She just made history and she was riding high. Her hand was hurting from all the autographs and her jaw ached from all the smiles and laughing. It wasn’t until two hours later that they finally got on the train to ride home. 

    When they finally got to the inn, it was more celebration with the family and more smiles and laughs. Yuuri was exhausted, by the time Viktor and her finally went back to her room to talk over her programs, she was at her breaking point. Viktor watched as she collapsed on the floor and sunk her head into her knees trying to hold back tears. He hesitated a moment before kneeling down and hugging her. She took a moment to relax into his warmth before smiling up at him. 

    “Sorry about this. Being around all those people for interviews and autographs is really nerve wracking for me. I get...really anxious,” she turns her head down ashamed of her own weakness. “When I’m on the ice, I can put up a good enough front until I’m finally alone like this. Then, I kind of...break down.” She gave an awkward laugh as she looks down at her knees again as the tears start to fall down her cheeks. 

    “Oh, Yuuri. I-I don’t know what to do,” he hugs her as she cries. “You were beautiful out there. Phenomenal. Amazing. You made history. Uh...I don’t know, Yuuri, should I just kiss you or something?” Viktor stuttered as he squeezed Yuuri. She pulled back as she stared at him flabbergasted before laughing. 

    “Your face is priceless right now,” Yuuri relaxed into Viktor’s arms as she laughed, and he smiled as he wiped the remaining tears away. 

    Yuuri was back, and she was better than ever. 


End file.
